Tuesday, August 16, 2011

No photo, no mojo

Currently listening to a small girl cry, as she refuses her daytime sleep.

I am completely exhausted by her, she has chronic separation anxiety and won't let me out of her sight, I can't even have a shower without her crying and beating down the door.
I don't remember things being this bad with Leo, may be I have blocked it from my memory!

She is up 3-4 times per night, and usually ends up in my bed, lying on my head, clutching me with those determined little hands. Yesterday while driving I thought I was hallucinating, surely this can't be good? I can't/won't do controlled crying at night, I don't have it in me to win that battle, so on talking to my beloved local M&CH Nurse, we are trying 'camping out'.

This involves me setting up a bed right next to her cot, and instead of laying her back down and stooping over the cot waiting for her to fall asleep, only then to hope that I don't step on a squeaky floorboard on the way out, I just reach into her cot to pat her, shush her, with the bonus that I am horizontal and in a bed. Woohoo.

Last night it kinda worked, she spent the whole night in her bed which is a small victory for me, and even though she was grizzling/awake for long periods of the night, there were no truly anxious moments, she was calm and that's what I'm after.

So I'm having trouble thinking of myself as a creative person, when my whole MO is to survive each day, get people fed, bathed, books read and cuddles given. Sam is on a gruelling schedule 3 weeks out from his solo show in Sydney, we are one sleep-deprived bunch over here. I am looking forward to the day when I can reminisce and say, 'yes that was shit, but aren't things so much better now?'

Next week at Craft Vic I might just end up sleeping in the store room. Oh boy that sounds good.

Peeps I need a pep talk, give me some positive vibes, and if anyone's tried the camping out method, how did it go for you?

Reading: 'An Object of Beauty' by the fabulous Steve Martin.

Listening to: Inside Vibe on PBS with Blair Stafford

Watching: Modern Family Season One (again, I have a huge crush on Sofia Vergara)


Unknown said...

I hear you! My girl was so much harder than my boy (14 cloth diaper changes in one night, really?!?!) I think it's a girl child thing. We did family bed which is similar and it does help with coping through this stage. It always takes a few weeks to transition to new things. Sounds like you're doing great at thinking outside the box and being a good attached mama. Hope this helps!

Carly said...

Hi Emma. I feel your pain and am probably coming out of the otherside of what you are in the middle of and it does get better! just gradually! My daughter is more often then not missing her daytime nap which I am mourning deeply but re-adjusting to the idea! It has made her super cranky towards the end of the day initially but her body seems to be getting used to it and it has seemed to make her wake more in the night when she missed her day sleep. I have started not rushing in immediately when she has been stirring and it has seemed to help - also taking her out on alot of active adventures! Haven't tried the camping out yet but keep persisting if you feel it is helping you. If it is at all possible to have a family member or someone babysit you probably need just a couple of hours out with your mates relaxing while your little one is in bed to recharge your batteries and feel human again.
keep persisting!

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

Thanks Ladies, after 3 nights I think we are getting somewhere, what a breakthrough!